Monday, March 26, 2012

Which is Hotter?

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or Beethoven the Saint Bernard in Beethoven?
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Ludwig von Beethoven died 185 years ago today,
and this is what it's come to. Poor Beethoven.
.

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Which is Hotter?

.

or Beethoven the Saint Bernard in Beethoven?
.
.
Ludwig von Beethoven died 185 years ago today,
and this is what it's come to. Poor Beethoven.
.

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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:


Photobucket

Stanley: Man, liquor goes fast in the hot weather.
You want a shot?
Blanche: No, I rarely touch it.
Stanley: Well there's some people that rarely touch it,
but it touches them often.

Happy 101 years of Tennessee Williams!
.

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:


Photobucket

Stanley: Man, liquor goes fast in the hot weather.
You want a shot?
Blanche: No, I rarely touch it.
Stanley: Well there's some people that rarely touch it,
but it touches them often.

Happy 101 years of Tennessee Williams!
.

Daniel Craig Cannot Be Contained

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At least that's what his zipper's telling me. (via)
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Daniel Craig Cannot Be Contained

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At least that's what his zipper's telling me. (via)
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I'm Going Home & I'm Gonna Bite My Dirty Pillows

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This news story was made to break my brain. That girl who won't leave me alone, Chloe Moretz, is apparently one of two girls in top contention for the remake of Carrie. The remake of Carrie was already making me want to drive a stake through my own heart - now they're just fucking taunting me.

Making it worse, I actually really like the other girl possibly up for the part - her name's Haley Bennett and we've extolled her awesomeness in The Hole and Kaboom. It's worse because I just want to straight up not have this happen at all and if Moretz stars in it then I just straightforwardly hate on it - if an actress I've been rooting for like Bennett gets the part it will be much more complicated.

And it's already complicated, because director Kimberly Pierce should be doing better things with her time. Why can't she just make Boys Don't Cry 2: Yes Boys Do In Fact Cry Sometimes, instead of attempting the impossible? Brian DePalma's Carrie is one of the few perfect things in the world - it stands alongside striped socks and Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs in the pantheon of greatness.


And then there's more: Pierce has apparently approached Jodie Foster and/or Julianne Moore to play Margaret White. WTF! I need to go smoke a pack of cigarettes, and weed, and angel dust.
.

I'm Going Home & I'm Gonna Bite My Dirty Pillows

.

This news story was made to break my brain. That girl who won't leave me alone, Chloe Moretz, is apparently one of two girls in top contention for the remake of Carrie. The remake of Carrie was already making me want to drive a stake through my own heart - now they're just fucking taunting me.

Making it worse, I actually really like the other girl possibly up for the part - her name's Haley Bennett and we've extolled her awesomeness in The Hole and Kaboom. It's worse because I just want to straight up not have this happen at all and if Moretz stars in it then I just straightforwardly hate on it - if an actress I've been rooting for like Bennett gets the part it will be much more complicated.

And it's already complicated, because director Kimberly Pierce should be doing better things with her time. Why can't she just make Boys Don't Cry 2: Yes Boys Do In Fact Cry Sometimes, instead of attempting the impossible? Brian DePalma's Carrie is one of the few perfect things in the world - it stands alongside striped socks and Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs in the pantheon of greatness.


And then there's more: Pierce has apparently approached Jodie Foster and/or Julianne Moore to play Margaret White. WTF! I need to go smoke a pack of cigarettes, and weed, and angel dust.
.

Avril Lavigne Abbey Dawn 2012

Avril Lavigne

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be..



... raiding the pantry with Jonathan Groff.


Has anybody ever used "raiding the pantry" as a euphemism for sexiness before? This can't be the first time. Surely other "pantries" have been "raided" before. And most surely Jonathan Groff's, at that. Zachary Quinto be raiding that shit every night!


Anyway it's Jonathan's 27th birthday today and it's well past due that I posted these pictures of him in his movie Twelve Thirty dontcha think? These would be a prime example of "Me forgetting shit during my Great Gratuities awards," because this scene probably definitely should have placed. Alas and alack, I forgot it existed. How I could forget this - Glee actor goes full frontal! - I dunno. Hit the jump for all the all of it.


Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be..



... raiding the pantry with Jonathan Groff.


Has anybody ever used "raiding the pantry" as a euphemism for sexiness before? This can't be the first time. Surely other "pantries" have been "raided" before. And most surely Jonathan Groff's, at that. Zachary Quinto be raiding that shit every night!


Anyway it's Jonathan's 27th birthday today and it's well past due that I posted these pictures of him in his movie Twelve Thirty dontcha think? These would be a prime example of "Me forgetting shit during my Great Gratuities awards," because this scene probably definitely should have placed. Alas and alack, I forgot it existed. How I could forget this - Glee actor goes full frontal! - I dunno. Hit the jump for all the all of it.


Can I Buy My Ticket For Catching Fire Yet?

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I find it hard to look back in time and remember that I once was of the opinion that Jennifer Lawrence was wrong for Katniss Everdeen, our heroine in The Hunger Games. If I were going to defend my tomfoolery now I'd say it was just after she'd glammed herself to high heights for Winter's Bone awards and the freshest vision I had of her was the super blond and ultra buxom version of her on the red carpets. This was not the Katniss I was looking for.

But now that I've seen the movie I kind of want to reach back through time and smack my stupid face good and hard. What was I thinking? Lawrence is terrific - she sells Katniss' steeliness and her vulnerability with equal aplomb. She sells everything - it's been awhile since I have read the books and the film reminded what a first-person experience the story is. This is Katniss' story, and I thought Gary Ross did a great job of getting us inside her head all the while not relying on narration at all, which would've been the easy (cluttered) way to get away with it. The camerawork gets a little bit wobbly for its own good at times but I thought as a way of plunking us down there with Katniss it worked more than it didn't.

Generally I thought Ross made a lot of really smart choices in turning Collins' book into a movie. We probably could have used more time with Katniss in District 12 at the start to set up just how despairing their lives are supposed to be, but I understand that it was already an hour before we even got to the Games, so keeping things moving was an issue. Lawrence sold me on the little notes where this echoed - the way she caressed the fabrics in her room in the Capitol managed to express both awe and disgust, or that half-starved look on her face in the flashback where Peeta tosses her the bread, for instance. I think it got across the notes it needed to, mostly. 

Josh Hutcherson was great - while he never looked like the Peeta I'd imagined as much as Lawrence came to look like Katniss, he was able to overcome that anyway and make Peeta, for me, even more interesting than he was in the book. I think he complicated Peeta's actions just as much as Lawrence did, so there were times where I was wondering just how much he was playing for the cameras too, which doesn't always get across in the books since they're entirely from Katniss' perspective.

Woody Harrelson gave good Haymitch but I really don't know what they were thinking with that distracting Owen Wilson look they gave him. But the weight that Haymitch feels sending off these kids to their deaths year in year out was there. As for Stanley Tucci... Stanley Tucci's teeth. Teeth! So much teeth.

I wasn't crazy about Lenny Kravtiz as Cinna - he kind of sucked all the air out of the room every time he showed up. It felt as if he showed up with two days to film all his scenes and everything stopped in its tracks for him. But he and Lawrence did have a believable, sweet rapport (I think she might be incapable of not having a natural rapport with anything though.) Elizabeth Banks was a wondrous preening vision of grotesquerie and made every single right choice for Effie - the "reaping" at the start was always going to be nightmarish, but Banks really dug into the awkwardness of it and made it entirely unique and disquieting.

Speaking of disquieting, Donald Sutherland y'all. His viper's smile is going to haunt my nightmares. I long to see him have more to do. That last shot gave me chills. And finally, never do I remember wanting to have Seneca-Crane-from-the-book's babies, but Wes Bentley has gone and changed all of that. Flame-tipped beard crests never found their way into my fetish-pile before, but here we are.



The violence was dealt with especially well, I thought - it felt brutal but it got across what happened without wallowing in gore, which just isn't necessary here. From what I remember Collins never got too detailed with it either. I love Battle Royale too y'all, but this isn't going to be Battle Royale. (An aside: God I'm so tired of the endless exhausting "I'm so smart for knowing other stories that told this sort of story!" catcalls, from The Running Man to The Most Dangerous Game and on and on. We get it. You're so clever, congratulations! But THG actually tells its own story. Move on.)

Anyway the death that really needed to work did, judging from the trembling lip and tear-streaked face I was trying to disguise from the people around me. Indeed I found that moment (I'm purposefully being vague just in case, but y'all know who I mean) with its spill over into revolution incredibly powerful, perhaps the most powerful in the film (it reminded me of the part is Ross' Pleasantville where the "coloreds" start getting attacked, actually) and knowing what it means for what's to come...

Mostly what struck me about having this first book retold to me was how small it seems after everything that comes about in the second and third books - how broad the world gets from here on out, I mean. Here in The Hunger Games it's all relatively straightforward and centered entirely on Katniss' experience... which is probably why the first book is the most successful, story-wise. And the film succeeds on that level - I felt there with this girl on fire. Indeed it succeeded well enough that once the end credits started I thought wouldn't it be wonderful if at the end of the credits the second film just started right then and there! Kind of as a surprise gift to us fans. So I am writing this from inside the theater still. And I will stay here until Catching Fire starts. I will live off of popcorn kernels and the kindness of strangers until then. Wish me luck! 
.

Can I Buy My Ticket For Catching Fire Yet?

.
I find it hard to look back in time and remember that I once was of the opinion that Jennifer Lawrence was wrong for Katniss Everdeen, our heroine in The Hunger Games. If I were going to defend my tomfoolery now I'd say it was just after she'd glammed herself to high heights for Winter's Bone awards and the freshest vision I had of her was the super blond and ultra buxom version of her on the red carpets. This was not the Katniss I was looking for.

But now that I've seen the movie I kind of want to reach back through time and smack my stupid face good and hard. What was I thinking? Lawrence is terrific - she sells Katniss' steeliness and her vulnerability with equal aplomb. She sells everything - it's been awhile since I have read the books and the film reminded what a first-person experience the story is. This is Katniss' story, and I thought Gary Ross did a great job of getting us inside her head all the while not relying on narration at all, which would've been the easy (cluttered) way to get away with it. The camerawork gets a little bit wobbly for its own good at times but I thought as a way of plunking us down there with Katniss it worked more than it didn't.

Generally I thought Ross made a lot of really smart choices in turning Collins' book into a movie. We probably could have used more time with Katniss in District 12 at the start to set up just how despairing their lives are supposed to be, but I understand that it was already an hour before we even got to the Games, so keeping things moving was an issue. Lawrence sold me on the little notes where this echoed - the way she caressed the fabrics in her room in the Capitol managed to express both awe and disgust, or that half-starved look on her face in the flashback where Peeta tosses her the bread, for instance. I think it got across the notes it needed to, mostly. 

Josh Hutcherson was great - while he never looked like the Peeta I'd imagined as much as Lawrence came to look like Katniss, he was able to overcome that anyway and make Peeta, for me, even more interesting than he was in the book. I think he complicated Peeta's actions just as much as Lawrence did, so there were times where I was wondering just how much he was playing for the cameras too, which doesn't always get across in the books since they're entirely from Katniss' perspective.

Woody Harrelson gave good Haymitch but I really don't know what they were thinking with that distracting Owen Wilson look they gave him. But the weight that Haymitch feels sending off these kids to their deaths year in year out was there. As for Stanley Tucci... Stanley Tucci's teeth. Teeth! So much teeth.

I wasn't crazy about Lenny Kravtiz as Cinna - he kind of sucked all the air out of the room every time he showed up. It felt as if he showed up with two days to film all his scenes and everything stopped in its tracks for him. But he and Lawrence did have a believable, sweet rapport (I think she might be incapable of not having a natural rapport with anything though.) Elizabeth Banks was a wondrous preening vision of grotesquerie and made every single right choice for Effie - the "reaping" at the start was always going to be nightmarish, but Banks really dug into the awkwardness of it and made it entirely unique and disquieting.

Speaking of disquieting, Donald Sutherland y'all. His viper's smile is going to haunt my nightmares. I long to see him have more to do. That last shot gave me chills. And finally, never do I remember wanting to have Seneca-Crane-from-the-book's babies, but Wes Bentley has gone and changed all of that. Flame-tipped beard crests never found their way into my fetish-pile before, but here we are.



The violence was dealt with especially well, I thought - it felt brutal but it got across what happened without wallowing in gore, which just isn't necessary here. From what I remember Collins never got too detailed with it either. I love Battle Royale too y'all, but this isn't going to be Battle Royale. (An aside: God I'm so tired of the endless exhausting "I'm so smart for knowing other stories that told this sort of story!" catcalls, from The Running Man to The Most Dangerous Game and on and on. We get it. You're so clever, congratulations! But THG actually tells its own story. Move on.)

Anyway the death that really needed to work did, judging from the trembling lip and tear-streaked face I was trying to disguise from the people around me. Indeed I found that moment (I'm purposefully being vague just in case, but y'all know who I mean) with its spill over into revolution incredibly powerful, perhaps the most powerful in the film (it reminded me of the part is Ross' Pleasantville where the "coloreds" start getting attacked, actually) and knowing what it means for what's to come...

Mostly what struck me about having this first book retold to me was how small it seems after everything that comes about in the second and third books - how broad the world gets from here on out, I mean. Here in The Hunger Games it's all relatively straightforward and centered entirely on Katniss' experience... which is probably why the first book is the most successful, story-wise. And the film succeeds on that level - I felt there with this girl on fire. Indeed it succeeded well enough that once the end credits started I thought wouldn't it be wonderful if at the end of the credits the second film just started right then and there! Kind of as a surprise gift to us fans. So I am writing this from inside the theater still. And I will stay here until Catching Fire starts. I will live off of popcorn kernels and the kindness of strangers until then. Wish me luck! 
.

Five Frames From ?

.

What movie is this?
.

Five Frames From ?

.

What movie is this?
.

Hardy Goes Gay For Footballer

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I can't decide if this is news that will make my boyfriend happy or not - he was always pissed off that Mickey Rourke was going to play the openly gay rubgy star Gareth Thomas, because of how, well, gross Mickey Rourke has become, and how not gross Gareth Thomas is. Well now comes word via Gareth himself that Rourke's dropped out because he's too old for all that training, and that Tom Hardy is in talks to play him. Tom Hardy is no stranger to get pumped up for a role, says the man who deals in understatements. But my boyfriend doesn't really like Tom Hardy either. But this has got to be better, right? I actually think Tom is brilliant casting and I really hope this works out. And not just because I want Tom to get good and gay again. Not just. I mean, there's probably like 5% or so where I care about his acting being good or whatever.