Bang Bang Bobby Pattinson

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Holy shit this NSFW French teaser trailer for David Cronenberg's adaptation of Don Delillo's book Cosmopolis is bonkers in the best of ways! Watch:

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(via) Dinosaurs! Hand-shooting! Fucking Juliette Binoche!

What else could I even ask for? I want this right now.

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Bang Bang Bobby Pattinson

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Holy shit this NSFW French teaser trailer for David Cronenberg's adaptation of Don Delillo's book Cosmopolis is bonkers in the best of ways! Watch:

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(via) Dinosaurs! Hand-shooting! Fucking Juliette Binoche!

What else could I even ask for? I want this right now.

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Fassy Built

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I assume by now everyone's watched the new trailer for Prometheus - if you'd have told me a couple of years back that I'd be geeking out so hard for a Ridley Scott movie, I... well I probably would have asked if it was related to Alien because no matter what I'd geek out over anything related to Alien. But the trailers have been so spectacular that even I'm a little bit astonished at how excited I am, because I've been on Ridley Scott's case for making shitty movies for the last twenty years. 

Anyway like I said I assume y'all have watched the new trailer but if not you can see it over here. I think that's it for me - I'm beyond convinced that I'll be seeing this and don't need to see anymore footage. Let's leave the rest of it in the dark until opening weekend. 

That said, have you seen this viral video involving the Fassybot? If I could grow a Fassy in a bag, I would have fifteen of them.

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Fassy Built

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I assume by now everyone's watched the new trailer for Prometheus - if you'd have told me a couple of years back that I'd be geeking out so hard for a Ridley Scott movie, I... well I probably would have asked if it was related to Alien because no matter what I'd geek out over anything related to Alien. But the trailers have been so spectacular that even I'm a little bit astonished at how excited I am, because I've been on Ridley Scott's case for making shitty movies for the last twenty years. 

Anyway like I said I assume y'all have watched the new trailer but if not you can see it over here. I think that's it for me - I'm beyond convinced that I'll be seeing this and don't need to see anymore footage. Let's leave the rest of it in the dark until opening weekend. 

That said, have you seen this viral video involving the Fassybot? If I could grow a Fassy in a bag, I would have fifteen of them.

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Good Morning, World

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That's Spanish actor and purposeful underwear-filler Julián Villagrán in director Nacho Vigalondo's second film (after the spectacular Timecrimes) called Extraterrestrial, which I saw in the Fall and was sadly underwhelmed by. Except for the whole "Hey, let's have Julián Villagrán spend the first ten minutes of the movie in his underwear!" part, that much was entirely satisfying. I was going through 2011's gratuities for our awards and realized I'd never posted anything from this lovely scene - if I had access to the movie itself we'd see more; as is all I've got is what they show in a trailer. But hey, that they gave this much in their trailer proves they knew what their best footage was. After the jump you can see a couple of caps and this well-beefcaked trailer of which I speak.

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Good Morning, World

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That's Spanish actor and purposeful underwear-filler Julián Villagrán in director Nacho Vigalondo's second film (after the spectacular Timecrimes) called Extraterrestrial, which I saw in the Fall and was sadly underwhelmed by. Except for the whole "Hey, let's have Julián Villagrán spend the first ten minutes of the movie in his underwear!" part, that much was entirely satisfying. I was going through 2011's gratuities for our awards and realized I'd never posted anything from this lovely scene - if I had access to the movie itself we'd see more; as is all I've got is what they show in a trailer. But hey, that they gave this much in their trailer proves they knew what their best footage was. After the jump you can see a couple of caps and this well-beefcaked trailer of which I speak.

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The Big Zulawski

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The next week in my life is just a shitstorm of stuff to do so I don't think I'll be able to get to any of these but the coincidence is too much not to mention - I wrote about that movie Possession with Isabelle Adjani losing her damn mind and Sam Neill losing his damn mind and then everybody having slimy sex with a giant squid man and then the world exploding yesterday, yeah? Well I had no idea when I watched it, although I guess his name's been in the ether as of late, that the movie's director Andrzej Zulawski has a big retrospective of his movies out at BAM in Brooklyn starting tonight and they're showing all of 'em, and if you live in New York and aren't a loser like me then you'd probably want to go see one or two or ten. That there up top is the NSFW trailer for the series and good lord I wish I could go see some. Oh well, I suppose I could go buy some angel dust and dip myself in lard and strawberry jam and then see what happens - it might be a very similar experience. 

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The Big Zulawski

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The next week in my life is just a shitstorm of stuff to do so I don't think I'll be able to get to any of these but the coincidence is too much not to mention - I wrote about that movie Possession with Isabelle Adjani losing her damn mind and Sam Neill losing his damn mind and then everybody having slimy sex with a giant squid man and then the world exploding yesterday, yeah? Well I had no idea when I watched it, although I guess his name's been in the ether as of late, that the movie's director Andrzej Zulawski has a big retrospective of his movies out at BAM in Brooklyn starting tonight and they're showing all of 'em, and if you live in New York and aren't a loser like me then you'd probably want to go see one or two or ten. That there up top is the NSFW trailer for the series and good lord I wish I could go see some. Oh well, I suppose I could go buy some angel dust and dip myself in lard and strawberry jam and then see what happens - it might be a very similar experience. 

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Twenty Five Days And Counting

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Have you guys seen the new trailer for A Game of Thrones? They're just going for my jugular using a Florence and the Machine song like that. Plus the good-looking menfolk being all gloomy and surly and downtrodden...

Twenty Five Days And Counting

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Have you guys seen the new trailer for A Game of Thrones? They're just going for my jugular using a Florence and the Machine song like that. Plus the good-looking menfolk being all gloomy and surly and downtrodden...

Which is Hotter?

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Frankenweenie or Frankenhooker?

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poll by twiigs.com

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Inspired by the just released trailer for Tim Burton's stop-motion remake of Frankenweenie. And my undying love for Frankenhooker. WANNA DATE?

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Which is Hotter?

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Frankenweenie or Frankenhooker?

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poll by twiigs.com

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Inspired by the just released trailer for Tim Burton's stop-motion remake of Frankenweenie. And my undying love for Frankenhooker. WANNA DATE?

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Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... surprising Xavier Samuel,

and being pleasantly surprised in return.

I can't really recommend watching the entire trailer that's from - it's for a movie called A Few Best Men, directed by Priscilla Queen of the Desert director Stephan Elliot, and co-starring a very pulled-back (in the physical not the actorly sense) Olivia Newton-John. But the first half-minute's great cuz hey look it's Xavier Samuel ass. After all those shots of him at the beach the other day, it's nice to have even more to see. Viva Xavier!

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... surprising Xavier Samuel,

and being pleasantly surprised in return.

I can't really recommend watching the entire trailer that's from - it's for a movie called A Few Best Men, directed by Priscilla Queen of the Desert director Stephan Elliot, and co-starring a very pulled-back (in the physical not the actorly sense) Olivia Newton-John. But the first half-minute's great cuz hey look it's Xavier Samuel ass. After all those shots of him at the beach the other day, it's nice to have even more to see. Viva Xavier!

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... monkeying around with Dominic Cooper.

It must be so strange to have some stranger on the street come up to you and hand you a little stuffed monkey. Don't you think? I'd be expecting it to split open and a little cloud of knock-out gas to spray from its innards and the next thing I'd know I was waking up in the back of a van bouncing over a dirt-road in the dark, a ball-gag between my teeth and the faint light of the dashboard illuminating the driver's giant mop of crazy-person hair in the front seat. Then again, I am paranoid, a little bit. Lesson being, don't take monkeys from strangers. It's weird. Also, yes, I gave him that monkey.

Anyway there is Dom news today! It sounds like he is not making that crime thriller Motor City with the Hughes Bothers, the one where he only had one line of dialogue the whole film - instead he's doing a movie called Cities with the director Roger Donaldson (He made Species! Plus The Bank Job and The Getaway.) and co-stars such as Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst. It's about "the months before the Dow Jones stock-market high and intertwines the stories of characters around the globe, including a New York hedge fund manager, a Mumbai police officer and a couple house-hunting in London." He is replacing Clive Owen. I hope he and Orlando Bloom are playing the house-hunting couple!

Oh and there's an international version of the Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter trailer out now, and it finally has a look at Dominic in it! Hooray! I guess they think he only appeals to overseas viewers or something? Fuck that! Watch that trailer here.

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... monkeying around with Dominic Cooper.

It must be so strange to have some stranger on the street come up to you and hand you a little stuffed monkey. Don't you think? I'd be expecting it to split open and a little cloud of knock-out gas to spray from its innards and the next thing I'd know I was waking up in the back of a van bouncing over a dirt-road in the dark, a ball-gag between my teeth and the faint light of the dashboard illuminating the driver's giant mop of crazy-person hair in the front seat. Then again, I am paranoid, a little bit. Lesson being, don't take monkeys from strangers. It's weird. Also, yes, I gave him that monkey.

Anyway there is Dom news today! It sounds like he is not making that crime thriller Motor City with the Hughes Bothers, the one where he only had one line of dialogue the whole film - instead he's doing a movie called Cities with the director Roger Donaldson (He made Species! Plus The Bank Job and The Getaway.) and co-stars such as Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst. It's about "the months before the Dow Jones stock-market high and intertwines the stories of characters around the globe, including a New York hedge fund manager, a Mumbai police officer and a couple house-hunting in London." He is replacing Clive Owen. I hope he and Orlando Bloom are playing the house-hunting couple!

Oh and there's an international version of the Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter trailer out now, and it finally has a look at Dominic in it! Hooray! I guess they think he only appeals to overseas viewers or something? Fuck that! Watch that trailer here.

Whack It Off, Benjamin Walker

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That might be the most erotic violent axe-swing I have ever witnessed. Good work, Benjamin Walker! Better work, Benjamin Walker's snug britches. The right proper first trailer for Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter is now online - five minutes after I posted about a couple brief shots being online, natch - and you can watch it right here. Right here, that is:

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Still not a single sighting of Dominic Cooper though, dammit.

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Whack It Off, Benjamin Walker

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That might be the most erotic violent axe-swing I have ever witnessed. Good work, Benjamin Walker! Better work, Benjamin Walker's snug britches. The right proper first trailer for Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter is now online - five minutes after I posted about a couple brief shots being online, natch - and you can watch it right here. Right here, that is:

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Still not a single sighting of Dominic Cooper though, dammit.

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I Am Link

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--- White Gunk shooting everywhere, it's the return of Spider-Man! And not just any Spider-Man, but the one that slapped Andy Garfield ass in spandex. Can't go wrong... well, maybe you can, who knows. There's a new trailer for the movie, watch it over here. I will see this movie because of my love for Garfield and for Emma Stone, but I found that first trailer that was all Spidey's POV as he flew between buildings more exciting than this more generic set-up one. Things I like here: the casting seems fun (Dennis Leary especially pops out), and the gymnastic fight scenes with Peter Parker flipping all around bug-like are nifty. But I hope they actually use that POV shot from the early trailer in the film, I was really looking forward to it, and it seemed a nice way to differentiate this from Raimi's films.

--- Man Or Machete - Robert Rodriguez is teaming up with Danny Trejo to make the Machete sequel nobody was clamoring for! Gosh I hope they bring back Jessica Alba, I really want that girl to keep getting work, don't you? (GAH.) Alright I kind of liked Machete, but e makes this while a version of Rose McGowan as Red Sonja rots in my memory and I get bitter, is all.

--- Filled With Dredd - I love Karl Urban but I think it's probably impossible to translate Judge Dredd into anything that doesn't seem dated and ridiculous, so these new pictures from the new film seem... dated and ridiculous, basically. 

--- The Runner Man - Not surprising, except for the fact that it took well over twenty-four hours to happen, is the news that the rumor that Harrison Ford would be in Ridley Scott's new Blade Runner movie was a whole lotta poppycock. Stop stop voting on that poll I posted, it's poppycock! Poppycock!

--- Spook Pysch - James Wan's movie about those paranormal investigators that worked on the Amityville house has a new name - it's now called The Warren Files, which if you ask me is better than what it was going to be called, which was The Conjuring. I didn't like The Conjuring, it sounds like some sort of role-playing card game. they've also cast the little kids for the movie, one of whom will hopefully be a serial depantser, constantly yanking down Patrick Wilson's drawers on screen. What? I have to come up with these things, it keeps me alive.

--- Muscle Mountain - A few new pictures from John Carter are online, see 'em here. They're not that exciting, since there's only minimum Taylor Kitch beefcake. So instead, check out this new shot of The Rock in the new GI Joe movie, in which he looks ridiculously huge. Big guys like this aren't usually my thing and yet I would climb right up The Rock and plant a flag on his head (if by "a flag" I mean... yeah, that). 

--- Ready Streep Go - If you haven't seen it already head over to The Film Experience where Nat had his readership rank their favorites of Meryl Streep's Oscar nominated performances. Here's where I admit that I have never seen Sophie's Choice. I know, I know. It's just sounds SO depressing, and not in a fun let's watch the world blow up Melancholia way. If I were ranking my favorites, Silkwood would easily be number one. I fucking worship Silkwood, it's a perfect movie and she's spectacular in it.

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I Am Link

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--- White Gunk shooting everywhere, it's the return of Spider-Man! And not just any Spider-Man, but the one that slapped Andy Garfield ass in spandex. Can't go wrong... well, maybe you can, who knows. There's a new trailer for the movie, watch it over here. I will see this movie because of my love for Garfield and for Emma Stone, but I found that first trailer that was all Spidey's POV as he flew between buildings more exciting than this more generic set-up one. Things I like here: the casting seems fun (Dennis Leary especially pops out), and the gymnastic fight scenes with Peter Parker flipping all around bug-like are nifty. But I hope they actually use that POV shot from the early trailer in the film, I was really looking forward to it, and it seemed a nice way to differentiate this from Raimi's films.

--- Man Or Machete - Robert Rodriguez is teaming up with Danny Trejo to make the Machete sequel nobody was clamoring for! Gosh I hope they bring back Jessica Alba, I really want that girl to keep getting work, don't you? (GAH.) Alright I kind of liked Machete, but e makes this while a version of Rose McGowan as Red Sonja rots in my memory and I get bitter, is all.

--- Filled With Dredd - I love Karl Urban but I think it's probably impossible to translate Judge Dredd into anything that doesn't seem dated and ridiculous, so these new pictures from the new film seem... dated and ridiculous, basically. 

--- The Runner Man - Not surprising, except for the fact that it took well over twenty-four hours to happen, is the news that the rumor that Harrison Ford would be in Ridley Scott's new Blade Runner movie was a whole lotta poppycock. Stop stop voting on that poll I posted, it's poppycock! Poppycock!

--- Spook Pysch - James Wan's movie about those paranormal investigators that worked on the Amityville house has a new name - it's now called The Warren Files, which if you ask me is better than what it was going to be called, which was The Conjuring. I didn't like The Conjuring, it sounds like some sort of role-playing card game. they've also cast the little kids for the movie, one of whom will hopefully be a serial depantser, constantly yanking down Patrick Wilson's drawers on screen. What? I have to come up with these things, it keeps me alive.

--- Muscle Mountain - A few new pictures from John Carter are online, see 'em here. They're not that exciting, since there's only minimum Taylor Kitch beefcake. So instead, check out this new shot of The Rock in the new GI Joe movie, in which he looks ridiculously huge. Big guys like this aren't usually my thing and yet I would climb right up The Rock and plant a flag on his head (if by "a flag" I mean... yeah, that). 

--- Ready Streep Go - If you haven't seen it already head over to The Film Experience where Nat had his readership rank their favorites of Meryl Streep's Oscar nominated performances. Here's where I admit that I have never seen Sophie's Choice. I know, I know. It's just sounds SO depressing, and not in a fun let's watch the world blow up Melancholia way. If I were ranking my favorites, Silkwood would easily be number one. I fucking worship Silkwood, it's a perfect movie and she's spectacular in it.

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